Seeking True Words

As I grew older
I lost the words out of my heart
Even though my voice became stable
But my words lost the touch of freedom
The freedom I was having
When my heart was big
When I was a child

I yearn to go back
to embrace those innocent words
But I can’t
They are left in me like the pictures on the walls
To measure the innocence left in me
Why I grew older?
To speak what my heart doesn’t wish
Now, I care more for the world
Even if my heart remains unheard
I shape my words for them
But they still remain unshaped for me
Why so desperation?
I ask myself, why?
The world has craved out my essence
Leaving it to die for her lies
Where is my heart?
Whose Lord is the Lord of heavens and earth
As it was rightly said
You do not die when your body dies
But you die
When your heart is dead
O Allah! Save me from this curse
Give life to my heart
Fill it with tranquility from your treasures
Make it pure like I had when I was a child
I don’t want to die for the desire of this cruel world
Which crush the softness and glow of my heart
Make people to meet my heart, not my false identify
That I have to leave back in this world
Let them listen to what my heart speaks
Nor the decorated words coming under the teeth

I pray,
Make my way easy to seek the true words from You, my Lord!

Poem without A Poet

O poet!
You are known to play with the words
But, I am not the one
I write them as they are
I write tears as tears
I write pain as pain
I write them as they are

O poet!
Could you play with my words
And change their meaning
So that,
What I always saw in my Valley
Would remain hidden in my lines
Making them also a poem
But not written by a poet

I Saw…

I am lost to that extent
Even I don’t know, who am I?
When I saw death passing near by me
I felt in me that I am alive
Life is not an elixir, that I could drink
But the cup of death had to be taken by every one
The tears in eyes are witnessing something of us
As if it is either helplessness or deep sadness
I even myself could never know the condition of my heart
Why then should I sneak in other hearts?
It is true, hearts are where God lives
Which way the heart would turn, nothing of this world know
I just heaped some words in me
My lips uttered the words but my heart spoke something else
The is no other greatest helplessness as of before death
That life passed away and no chance is left
But the forgetfulness of God is, even more, greater helplessness
That life is there, but chances are taken away
I just kept wondering and wondering and ended up looking myself
Unthankful of these favors by Him, I saw a person in myself  

One Among Them

When words strangle your soul
The restlessness recrudesces on the forehead
I become lost somewhere deep in me
As if I have been pushed from the ship to drown in the sea
I want to see the bottom
where the words are scratching my counscious

The world will allure you to it’s lies
But only here we can also find the truth
Every age has been a test for humanity
Why then we should curse our times?
My words take different shapes inside
Sometimes forms questions and sometimes answers
But what I find is that they are relative
Changes their size and weight with the emotions

Only His words are absolute, the Lord of all ages
We only see a drop of life in His infinite ocean of creations
He guides whom He wills
I pray for myself to be one among them



Words

How would you feel for those words,
Which perforate and touch your conscious
They silence you in depths of your own
Where they strike the mystic walls inside the soul

Words look brill when decorated
But touch only the lips of the one speaking them
The hearts superficially admire but stay locked
The bond formed is momentary and fades away


Words that touch the heart are the words of truth
They transpire from the heart and reach their destination
They have the power to pierce the heavens
And reach the place where they are answered

Life without words is like world without water
If contaminated, diseases arise
If pure, blessing poured like a shower of rain
The choice of words lies within you
You want them to make a graveyard in your heart
Or you want them to grow a flowery garden

CRUMBLED

I write and then erase
The emotions are hell-bent to leave with the ink
But when I see them written, I again scratch them off
As people will see them
merely as words
questioning and raising their doubts
But who is there to understand the meaning they contain
related to my feelings

Crumbled papers have surrounded me
And in their silent presence
lie the engraved sprinkles of my emotions
I leave my chair and put the blanket over my head
Pretending to myself that I am sleeping and anonymous to the surroundings
soon that pretension erodes
I, again get lost in my emotions
This restlessness and discomposure has a voice, that is striking the walls
And when I take off the blanket of my head
I see words crawling
I get up and rub them with my palms to erase them all
But only the white paint adhere between the lines of my hand

I imagine, burning all the pages
But again reality slays my imagination to recognize
this all is deeply embedded in my heart
Now, my reticent feelings are silently screaming
In my restless sleep, they keep violently dreaming
Searching in myself my words
To free them from my fingertips
my ink of restlessness kept inside me
wants to be addressed
I write and then erase
Crumble the paper and throw
In a silent heap of silent emotions, where it belongs

YOUR UNKNOWN WISH

YOUR UNKNOWN WISH

I now want to give up with my words
For me it has become a stalemate
Because at the end rest prevailed in you
And I am left with restlessness

The snow which is falling there with deep calmness
Covering and soothing your all mishaps

How beautiful it would be outside?
When you will be seeing from the window
The whitness would be blushing in your eyes
And a layer of deep satisfaction would be surrounding you
Your arms taking you in
And heartbeats resonating the silence in you

And here I stand burning in the heat
Scorching sunrays disclosing the scars again
The pain engulfing me like the sea eating the drowning ship
Leaving me in fumes
I deliberately crush the fallen leaves for not listen my heartbeats
The silence is screaming in me
Crying and wailing
My eyes blazing to burn down the content
Within my skin deep

And I am left in a state of madness

The surrounding blanket would be giving you a charming warmth
It’s cozy feeling would be helping with your sleep
With beautiful dreams to come
With a beautiful hope to wake up with

And here I lie sleepless with my eyes open
Tired out of these emotions
Which I am carrying in me all day long

If you wished this to happen
With me
I gotta say you congrats
You got what you wished for

UNENDING

UNENDING

I fear that it should not remain an incomplete story
Its unending ending will keep chasing my deep imaginations
Knocking my soul to keep a wide door open
For all the pain to enter blazing my emotions
It will keep my dreams burning in my eyes
I will wish for tears but before flowing, they will dry
With every step and every blink, I will be sighing
I will try to cry but who will listen to my voiceless heart
Which is left soaked in the ink to write the ending part
I am turning pages after the last words to find the remaining
But everyday they are the same, silent and blank
But their stamps with ink of blankness are on my heart
Let its unending end break me once for all
Because I don’t to be broken with every passing moment
The battle is intense with the story on the line
Waiting to get over for to get the remaining
The way it hurt me with its unending ending
In the same way, I will hurt it back by keeping it until that last word
And will start writing a new one to make it jealous of its owns words
The way it left me burning, I will leave it unending