UNENDING

UNENDING

I fear that it should not remain an incomplete story
Its unending ending will keep chasing my deep imaginations
Knocking my soul to keep a wide door open
For all the pain to enter blazing my emotions
It will keep my dreams burning in my eyes
I will wish for tears but before flowing, they will dry
With every step and every blink, I will be sighing
I will try to cry but who will listen to my voiceless heart
Which is left soaked in the ink to write the ending part
I am turning pages after the last words to find the remaining
But everyday they are the same, silent and blank
But their stamps with ink of blankness are on my heart
Let its unending end break me once for all
Because I don’t to be broken with every passing moment
The battle is intense with the story on the line
Waiting to get over for to get the remaining
The way it hurt me with its unending ending
In the same way, I will hurt it back by keeping it until that last word
And will start writing a new one to make it jealous of its owns words
The way it left me burning, I will leave it unending

WALKING

WALKING

I am walking with the broken feelings in my heart
Again, unaddressed not knowing from where to start
Left lost in the mirror in front of me
Like a broken ship in middle of a sea

Something is again seeping deep in my skin

Overtaking me and melting my patience
These flowing tears have a strange cry
A wait for the someone in the lost wilderness
Flames surround me when I look into the water
When I turn around to see, they disappear

Deep lost in the stories of mine
Like the lost sunshine among the forests of pine
Lying scattered like the sand on a shore
Submitting to the tides to take me along
To save me from the feet that will take me back to the world
For they will leave me again unaddressed

These lifeless legs are walking with a heavy heart
It seems that in the next step I will fall
But I know there is no one to take me up except God
As He healed me before when I was broken
So I will keep walking with the same hope again in my heart

NAILS OF MEMORIES

20190130_230837NAILS OF MEMORIES

Memories are coming home again
To strike the nails to cease me on a spot
With my hands against the wall
To ask myself again the same
Who I am and who you are?

The winds blowing inside me
Turn into storm when they bring them back
My eyes starts lighting and beats become thunders
Even though I stand still, but running miles inside me

They tie me back with the helplessness
I am seeing the wall
But with reflections of them
I want to pull these nails out of me
Which these memories have left drenched in my blood

They are taking my sleep away from me
To keep it on a clock with my eyes fixed on it
I want to drup all its needles
But when I go near it ceases to exist

You can’t see what I see
Drowing somewhere deep
Of immeasurable fathom
And the light is fading away
As I am going to my memories

FORGIVE ME

FORGIVE ME

O, Allah! forgive me for I am a sinner

Every day I sell my soul to these hellish desires

My eyes are overtaken by the lies of this life

And every day I forget to remember my death

 

I am ashamed that many people get mistreated by me

And I forget to ask well being of those, to whom I am entitled to 

I lie to myself for today, for the tomorrow to come

I beautify myself for the world, but not for the grave where I have to go

 

O, Allah! Make me not the victim of my ignorance

For, it will keep destroying my heart and soul

I know I have been a sinner all along

Forgive me! and wrap me in your mercy

MY GRANDFATHER…..ABAJAAAN

MY GRANDFATHER…..ABAJAAN

When I would reach the street you once lived in
Out of your respect, shyness used to hide my heart
I would start to remember the golden piece of advices, you gave me all along
Leisurely my soul would rest, as I knew soon I would see you

When I would open the door of that beautiful room
And my lips saying a greeting of peace resonating from my heart
You would reply with a smile that used to heal all my wounds
You would always get up to hug me, even in the last days of your struggle with life

That room was the best place for me in the world
As there was strange auora of happiness ingrained in its walls
Adorned by your utmost simplicity and great conduct
Your sincerity, truthfulness and faith for GOD, above all

Then those beautiful stories that you used to tell
Always had great lessons for life
I was in love for your love for GOD
And always wondered how HE had put in you a beautiful soul

When you used to recite the poems of the great poet of the east
Each and every line inspired me within like the opening of bud due to sunlight
I wanted to be with you, to learn more and more of life
As now there is a great void in my life after you have left

I stood for some moment at your grave
Looking at the reality of this life
But how you lived your one was itself an example of revolution
I dearly miss you today, but we all are helpless before HIS decisions

All those moments, again and again, bring tears back to my eyes
Because it is hard for my heart to accept that you have left for heavenly abode
May ALLAH forgive you and admit you in Jannah
Ameen

SHADE

SHADE

I want to switch off these lights around me
To dissolve your shade in the darkness
I want to sit down alone with my closed heart
Let me live! Let me live with my lonliness

I don’t know even your face and who you are
But your deep imprints have become my part
When I sit to write, your shade covers the page
And my words gets trapped as if kept in cage

I don’t know what would happen the day when you would appear with your real face
Which way I would run to hide my heart?
Or like a pegion I would keep standing with the closed eyes
Waiting for the eagles to tear me apart

Why you still haunt me even with all the lights off?
My ears keep resonating with your footsteps
As if you continue to walk over my heart
I think I have to live like this, with my body and your shade

GO AWAY

GO AWAY

You just came to take yourself farther away
Taking again a piece of mine to burry in a grave
Leaving a restless heart to suffer from a sense of brutal separation

Was my part of love so poisonous?
Which you are returning me back like snake bites
Wished may be I had never been your unlucky part
But unfortunately, I was
For that would make me ashamed and embarrassed all life long
All those songs that I wrote
Are haunting me in my empty thoughts
You only loved me in my presence
And cursed me all along in my absence
Evident is that from your words
Reading me a drunk and a basket of desires
What else more could be a downgraded identity for me
My resistance has been abused, undermined my care and prayers for you
For you told that I left you to burn
But I am left in ashes even before burning
I hope my patience will gather me again
Will make me stand again in the rows
To prostrate again and again to GOD
To collect my heart and heal my soul
Come and put a dagger in my heart
Take its blood and then go away
So when you would come again, there would be nothing left for you to take
I will stick your poem on the wall
To remind myself where I am and where you are?
To remind me of your last wish
Which was ” GO AWAY”

Words to this protest will not end
I will keep writing amongst your separation

LIVING IN THE WORDS

LIVING IN THE WORDS

They might seem just lifeless words on the wall
But I live among them in my lonliness
Searhing the happiness
Which sometimes the world fails me to give

I have a home in between those lines
Like a home in an outlying valley
Whose mountains when I see
Remain covered by the words of my heart
The winds brush the surface of flowers of my garden
In greed of stealing their colours
To give colourful meaning to their existence
Singing a song, the one I like to listen
With the words of mine and melody of rain hitting against the glass of my heart
Here beautiful days lay in wait
For the poems of dusk oozing out of last rays
Then resting in peace with the advent of night

The first rays again lit lamps of love for to glow
Giving light to the birds to chirp to welcome the morning
My chair in my home of words lie waiting for me to come
To again sit at the window
With the garden of words before my eyes
Waiting for you to come with your beautiful poems
To sow them deep in my heart, to decorate my world of imagination

FADING FACE

FADING FACE

In you, I am just remains of a memory
Who knows what will be there after a century?
Soon my face will fade away in your eyes
And I will remain as if I was also the one among your lies

May be the day when you would walk again on the same way
Where our feet have left invisible marks
My songs would appear again in your ears
But my faded face would be too hard to remember
I would wish for the winds to blow that day
To take that song from your ears far away 

Blurred remains of me in you should now die
For you to take a deep down sigh
Which is locked in you with nails of my memories

As my feelings for you are your enemies 
Relieve my faint spots from your heart
So for you to make a great new start
A start with me no where near you

Even the unknown faces never seen by you
Try to keep me in them, the last one in the queue
Where your eyes would never reach my face
And your sight would become tired to chase

BLOOD OF REVOLUTION

BLOOD OF REVOLUTION

Why do you fear the living ones in the streets?
You should fear the martyrs living inside the graves
Because you are helpless to kill them again
Their blood still burns your soul and pierces your heart
Their presence is a sign of glory to come again in the form of your loss
There is nothing more precious than their blood
So precious that even hard to find in the paradise
The last smile they go with is a source of millions of tears
And there presence even in the graves will keep burning
The candle of revolution
As many more unknown faces will walk as living martyrs
Really the blood of revolution is priceless
It carries the fate of nations
It carries the prayers of that mother who kissed his martyr son for one last time
So your might is just a useless entity
Void of any value and fetching you only the curses
Your smirks will return to you in the form of black faces
That you will be forced to wear when the justice will be served by the GOD
On that day you will see the blood of revolution that you shed
Your faces will turn more black by seeing the reflection of your tyranny